It’s a dystopia where plot is non-existent, where the dialogue is so spare that it could easily be replaced by a lead character simply grunting, “Me want to save Earth.” Watching this film is like stepping into the most hideous dystopian timeline-not one where powerful alien cars rise up and take over the world, but one where the only studio movies that get made are born of manic, Bay–esque nightmares, stuffed with fiery explosions and dull fight scenes. (The film jokes that one of the Transformers looks like a C-3PO rip-off, an attempt at pop-cultural awareness that feels more like a self-inflicted punch in the face.) But it succeeds only in suturing together the worst aspects of each genre, clinging to the dregs of its more intelligent predecessors. Michael Bay’s latest explosive offering wants to be everything-a medieval romp, an outer-space spectacle, a taut action-thriller. Transformers: The Last Knight is an apocalyptic identity crisis come to life.
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